Sunday, August 1, 2010

Lapse

My lapse in blogging has been in great part due to Arlo's seperation anxiety. Oh my goodness. When we're at home, if I leave the room, he screams. If I put him down for 2 seconds to go to the bathroom, he screams until I pick him up again. It's ridiculous. I know some might say " awww, that means he loves you" but seriously, folks... couldn't he show it in some other way? It's nice to be needed but GEEZ. I'm trying really hard to keep telling myself that it's just a phase( and I hope that it is) but it is SO HARD to ever have a moment to myself sometimes. Geoff just took him to the grocery so I could breathe. Sometimes being a mom is the best thing in the world-- and other times like right now I'm just so exhausted. I could go to bed right now. I still have to hold him for naps( although he did nap by himself the other day, so I'm counting that as progress) and that gets to be draining, because that's the time in which I need to use to clean and do other stuff around the house. He's closing in on 8 months now and I'm thinking I'm just going to have to let him cry it out. I hate it. I hate seeing those little tears streaming down his face and knowing it's MY fault that they're there in the first place. I just don't know, and I am just trying to remind myself that everyday is a new day and that we WILL get through this, just like we got through the past 7 months. I want to reiterate how much I love him and I can't imagine my life without him.... but right now I'm really, really tired. And that's just me being honest.

1 comment:

Sarah said...

thinking of you!